by Robert Maxwell
Part of the purpose of this website is to help men improve themselves. Much of this improvement centers around physicality, but improvement of character is just as vital. Just about everywhere I look, I see weak, underachieving men. When did it become OK for a large percentage of males to be indecisive, physically flaccid, and non-leaders in their own homes? Call me old fashioned, but I believe men should be alphas. This doesn’t mean lording authority over your wife or girlfriend, but it does mean providing strong leadership within your family and community. When I look at the men of today, I don’t see these qualities. Part of the blame lies with modern feminism, which is determined to portray men as idiots and worse, and has convinced many of us that it’s true. Many modern wives feel it’s OK to treat their husbands like lovable dogs - attempting to train them into patterns of desirable behaviour, and if they step out of line, putting them in their place. When coupled with a woman of this mindset, many men prefer to roll over and accept their situation, in the interest of keeping the peace. This approach might make things easier for a while, but it’s not the manly way. It’s also not correct or fair to place all the blame for modern men’s lack of masculinity on modern women. If men have been relegated to lovable idiots, they’ve allowed it to happen. But the trouble with men goes beyond their interactions with women. As a group, we’re less capable providers, physically weaker, less decisive, and more afraid of hardship than our predecessors. Not many modern men are capable of settling the great frontier, or clearing an acre of land, farming it, and building a cabin. These feats were commonplace for men of old. If you recognize In yourself some room for improvement on the manliness front, this article’s for you. Here are three ways you can become more like the strong, decisive men of the past.
Speak Your Mind & Risk Being Offensive
Modern men have a passivity problem. If fear of argument, upsetting the apple cart, or having to take leadership makes you silent, there’s a problem. Obviously not all thoughts should be spoken or acted on, but these days, men don’t speak or act on enough of their thoughts. Not only does this make the world a less productive place - it leads to frustrated, unfulfilled men, too. Indiana Jones didn’t keep all his thoughts locked away in a shell of timidity and passivity. Neither has any non-fictional great man of the past. Besides fear of taking action, fear of causing offense also keeps men quiet. There’s a fairly famous video interview on YouTube with clinical psychologist Dr. Jordan Peterson. In it, he says “In order to think, you have to risk being offensive.” This hits the nail on the head. You shouldn’t purposely seek out offense in the things you say or do, but fear of causing it should never keep you from saying or doing something worthwhile.
Get Physically Strong
I’ve gone over this particular point on many other occasions, but it’s worth mentioning again. One biochemical reason for the failure of modern masculinity is low testosterone levels. Testosterone is the wonderful hormone that makes men masculine. Without enough of it, your manliness quotient will erode, your wife will stop respecting you, and you’ll probably stop respecting yourself, too. Barbell resistance training has been proven to increase testosterone, allowing you to build more muscle, fend off aging longer, and be less ruled by fear and passivity. Physical strength improves your mind, too. A man who’s developed the strength to squat a 300 pound barbell will certainly find confidence that carries over into many other areas of life. If you haven’t tried training before, I can tell you from experience that the confidence boost you get after seeing yourself improve your strength by 100 or 200 pounds is huge. Other challenges in life tend to pale in comparison to hoisting a heavy barbell. In short, lifting weights helps you believe in yourself.
Do whatever It Takes to Provide for Your Family
I might ruffle a few feathers at this point, but in the spirit of this article, I’m OK with that. Let me start by explaining that I have no problem whatsoever with women who want to work outside the home and have a family as well. I do believe that children are better off if at least one parent is home with them full-time, but to each their own. That said, I think there is a problem when a woman wants to be a homemaker and has no desire to work outside the home is forced to do so because of inadequate provision by her husband. This male shortcoming is extremely common. Not so far back in history, women never worked outside the home, and men provided for the needs of the entire family without question or complaint. More often than not, providing for those needs involved a huge amount of back-breaking physical work. These days most work is much easier, yet the productivity of men has never been lower. I personally know a good number of young mothers who would love to stay home with their children, caring for them and the home, but are prevented from doing so by financial necessity. In response, their husbands casually remark how they know their wife can get a job, so why should they bust their ass? It’s a loser’s perspective, and leads to less respect and harmony within families. If your lady wants to work outside the home, great. But if not, don’t be one of those guys who slacks off, knowing she’ll make up for your failure.